Best Television Series – Drama

15.  How I Met Your Mother- CBS, 2005- present: Not a lot of traditional sitcoms on this list, but How I Met Your Mother is a traditional single camera sitcom with a very unique non-linear storytelling method.  It has a great ensemble cast including Neil Patrick Harris in his greatest role since Doogie Howser, Barney Stinson.

14.  Mad Men- AMC, 2007- present: I think a lot of people wouldn’t have thought a drama set in the 1960’s based in an advertising agency would have worked.  And in different hands they sure might have been right, but under the skillful leadership of Matthew Weiner it’s brilliant.  Mad Men captures an era so different than the one we live in today, and captures it so accurately it’s scary.  I know people that grew up in this period that watch it just for the nostalgia, the fact that the show is so well written and so good is just an added bonus.  Only three seasons in, it’s put AMC on the map as a creator of original shows.  Largely an ensemble piece it’s hard to believe that most of the actors weren’t even alive at the period the show is set.

13. 24- FOX, 2001-present: Obviously when the show creators Joel Surnow and Robert Cochran first dreamed up the idea of 24 they had no idea that the world would change soon after.  The first episode of 24 aired a little less than two months after the events of September 11th, 2001.  All of a sudden the show became the most topical show on TV.  Set in real time with each episode taking place in a twenty four hour period with twenty four episode, one for each hour of the day it was original and ground-breaking.  We can also thank 24 for giving us one of TV’s greatest heroes, Jack Bauer, who also happens to be #1 on our list of TV’s biggest bad-asses.

12.  Six Feet Under- HBO, 2001-2005: The first of four offerings from HBO on this list.  Who would have thought a show about a funeral home could be so good?  The show was so dark, yet oddly comedic as well.  The Fisher might be one of the most dysfunctional families in the history of television.

11. Breaking Bad- AMC, 2008- present: High School chemistry teacher realizes he’s dying so he begins to make and sell meth.  Sounds like the premise for a comedy, but there is very little funny about this great show.  It’s dark and wonderfuly well written.  The only problem is that the seasons are so short.  Season three starts this fall and it’s going to be great!

10. Sons of Anarchy- FX, 2008- present: Readers of JoeOnTheTube.com know just ow muck I love this show.  It is a mix of everything that makes TV great.  Wonderful writing, great characters played by amazing actors, the perfect level of drama with just enough laughs thrown in to break the tension.  This modern retelling of Hamlet set in the world of outlaw motorcycle clubs is a fresh and welcome change to so much of the monotonous TV that is out there.  With only two seasons under it’s belt I had trouble moving it any higher, but next year when the real list comes out and it has a thrid season out I expect it to fall in the top five.Series creator Kurt Sutter knows what makes awesome TV.

9.  Top Chef- Bravo, 2006- present: Despite this being the decade of reality shows I’ve only  included one on this list, the one I consider the gold standard for reality shows.  Top Chef took the format of Project Runway, and improved on it.  At it’s heat it’s a simple cooking contest, but the drama that comes up in the kitchen and in the house where the chefs who are competing (I don’t like the term “cheftestants”) live really turns up the heat.  Plus a little Padma Lakshimi is always a good thing.

8.  It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia- FX, 2005-present: It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia is the funniest show currently on TV, and the second funniest show of the past decade (I’ll get to the funniest show later in the list).  While it might be the funniest show currently on TV, let’s face it that humor isn’t for everyone.  It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia is an equal opportunity offended, and sure to offend everyone who watches it sooner or later, but that’s one of the things that makes it so great.  This show started off with a bang and got better after the addition of Danny DeVito in the second season.

7. The Office- NBC, 2005-present: I know there are those people out there that believe the American version of The Office is just a poor man’s rip-off of the British version, and that might have been the case for the first season and a half, but since then The Office has taken the foundation that the British version poured and built a very solid house on it.  Each season seems to get better and better, and the mockumentry format of the show makes it feel like no other show on TV.  The fact that they’ve held on to the original cast through six seasons despite some of them becoming huge stars says a lot about the quality of this show.

6.  Big Love- HBO, 2006- present: It’s hard to qualify Big Love, I guess it is a drama, but man it sure is funny sometimes as well.  The show centers on a modern polygamist family, the Henricksons living n Sandy, Utah.  Bill Henrickson is just like any other modern man, except he was raised on a polygamist compound and he has three wives.  The problems that comes with having three wives are the same as the problem you have with one wife, just three times as many.  The series also introduced us to one of the great villains of the decade, the Prophet Roman Grant , played by Harry Dean Stanton.  Season 4 starts January 10th, it’s going to be great.

5.  30 Rock- NBC, 2006- present: The show that takes place within a show, sort of.  With a cast like Tiny Fey, Alec Baldwin, Tracy Morgan and an amazing supporting cast how could this show not be great.  Despite the first three seasons not doing great in the ratings, NBC has stuck with it (even with all the fun they have at the Peacock Network’s expense) and each season gets better and better.  With Tina Fey Writing many of the episode it shouldn’t be a surprise how great this show is.

4. Curb Your Enthusiasm- HBO, 2000- present?: It would be easy to understand if Larry David retired from television all together after creating, Seinfeld, one of the greatest sitcoms of all time, especially considering all the money he’s made.  Luckily for us that wasn’t the case.  In 1999, just a year after Seinfeld went off the air Larry David started in a special for HBO called Larry David: Curb Your Enthusiasm.  It was intended to be a one-off show, and it became the series, Curb Your Enthusiasm.  The show is loosely based on Larry David’s real life, and is completely improvised, which adds to it’s comedic appeal.    The seventh season of Curb Your Enthusiasm just ended last week, and there is a good chance that it will be the end of the series.

3. The Wire- HBO, 2002-2008: If not for The Soprano’s, The Wire would be the greatest show in HBO history; and it is easily the greatest cop show on the decade, maybe of all time..  Set in the gritty crime ridden city of Baltimore each season dealt with a different aspect of life revolving around the drug trade.  The central police characters were the same, but the story was different each season with stories dealing with the port, politicians, the school system and the print media.  The show was raw and it was real.  No happy endings here.

2.  Arrested Development- FOX, 2003-2006: Easily the funniest show of the past decade.   If ever there was a case of a show being gone too soon this is it.  Arrested Development centered around the Bluth family, a high dysfunctional group of misfits surrounding the only sane member of the family, Michael.  The writing was brilliant and the cast was amazing with Jason Bateman, David Cross, Jeffrey Tambor, Will Arnet, Tony Hale, Portia De Rossi, Jessica Walther, and Michael Cera.  As if that wasn’t enough, the guest stars and supporting cast were a virtual who’s who of Hollywood, including Ed Beagly Jr., Liza Minneli, Carl Wethers, Charlize Theron, Scott Baio, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, James Lipton, Amy Poehler, Ben Stiller, Jeff Garlin, Christine Taylor, and Jane Lynch to name only a few.  This show lives on in DVD, and soon to be in re-runs on IFC.  There are talks about a movie, but no news on a release date yet.  I would also like to point out that this show made me feel okay about my condition, I’m a never-nude.

1.  The Soprano’s- HBO, 1999-2007: Easily the best show of the past ten years, and maybe the greatest show of all time.  The Soprano’s is what TV should be.  It was real, it was dynamic, it was gritty, and we loved every bit of it.  From the moment we meet Tony Soprano and his ducks to the final scene in the diner, The Soprano’s never took a misstep.  The Soprano’s made it alright to root for the bad guys.  It was unlike any other show that came before it, and while may will try I don;t know that it’s formula will ever be repeated successfully.  David Chase is brilliant, and  hope that he will come back to TV again soon.

I’m sure I left a lot out.  Let me know what you think belonged on this list that I missed.

So that means no reviews of Community or 30 Rock today since I didn’t get to see either one.  My goal is to have them up by Monday.  Of course we will still have RealityRawks’s review of the Project Runway Season Finale and Dan’s review of The Office up for you today.

Happy TV watching and see you on Monday.

58, you say?

Another solid episode of The Office. Lots of good things happening here, with some terrific lines.

Functionally, it got rid of Pam’s mom as Michael’s girlfriend (good thing), it maintained Pam’s crazy spats and Jim’s fear of said crazy spats (good thing, although I hope the spats don’t disappear once she delivers the baby), and it featured another of Dwight’s schemes to dethrone Jim (always a good thing).

"You owe me one."

And the episode had a schoolyard fight. Well, it didn’t quite deliver on the fight, although the writers wisely knew that if there’s a fist on the mantle in act one it’s gotta punch in act three, but it had all the requisite drama with an amusing buildup in which the office mates were forced to choose sides and pretty much everyone rooted for Pam to knock out Michael. Toby even went so far as to teach Pam how to throw a punch.

Jenna Fischer was particularly strong in this episode, so I gotta give her props. And it’s great to see that she took time out of her grueling schedule of promoting her airbrushed magazine covers.

Way more important than Afghanistan.

But before we get to the physical violence, the lunch date scene was a classic uncomfortable Michael Scott moment in which he makes the right decision (break up with her) for the wrong reasons (she reminds him of his unfulfilled life and imminent death) at the absolute worst time (on her birthday in front of Jim and Pam).

Michael: “I am not robbing the cradle. If anything, I’m robbing the grave.”

The dumping of Pam’s mom was uncomfortable, but not quite cringe-worthy for me as I don’t have anything invested in her character and don’t want a love interest for Michael other than Holly, even though Holly has the problem of not bringing any conflict. They’re TOO well suited for each other, but unlike Pam and Jim, they are a very entertaining team to watch. So, writers, I ask you to please bring back Amy Ryan, even if only for a couple episodes, so that we may get more inspired bits like…”Slumdunder Mifflinaire!”

Happier times (kinda).

With the brutal breakup, we are reminded that Michael can be a really shallow jerk (reminiscent of an older episode where he went on a blind date and told the woman about Jan and her breast implants) but I don’t believe he’s malicious; it comes from a place of complete ignorance of himself and social norms; that he could go that long without knowing the age of the woman he’s sleeping with, and then once he finds out decide to immediately dump her, is not an act of malice, but an act of cluelessness. And that’s why we love him.

But the Oldenburgs weren’t the only couple bucking horns. One of my favorite moments was Jim busting Pam on her fake emergency:

"Hello? Well, that's great!"

Lots of little moments struck gold:

• Kelly complimenting Pam’s mom on her necklace and then shaking her head “no” to the camera.
• Ryan’s photography project of office nudes, with Kelly as the first model.
• Creed being relieved that the emergency paper shipment was not real, because it was never supposed to get there.
• Jim can’t call off the fight because Pam “looks crazy” but he can work on a solution if Michael can give him a week, maybe two.
• Andy is unable to let a favor go unreturned, leading to a war of pleasantries between him and Dwight.

It all leads to high noon at closing time.

Michael: “Am I scared of getting hit in the face? No. Every day, dominatrixes get paid by weirdos for just that privilege. I’m scared I’m gonna love it.”

Out in the parking lot (which is apparently far enough so as to be off company grounds?), the gang waits in eager anticipation of the big hit. Kelly’s even enjoying a pre-game snack…

Michael: “Are you eating popcorn?”

Kelly: “It has almost no calories.”

Michael apologizes to Pam and she stands down, until he mentions that her mom was the one that came on to him first. So it’s open season…

When saying you're sorry isn't good enough.

Phyllis: “Holy crap.”

Pam: “You okay?”

Michael: “Nooo!”

Pam: “Yer okay.”

Jim: “Feel better?”

Pam: “No. You were right.”

We end on Michael’s interview in which he describes how Pam’s slap gave him an instant vision of his future life, which includes four kids, a hover car, a hover house, wealth, happiness and eternal life.

“It doesn’t sound like much, but it’s enough for me.”

-Dan Calvisi
Dan’s Scriptomatic Cinematic Telematic 3D!

BONUS: Here’s Mindy Kaling’s music video parody (they’re all in character) for the new song from Subtle Sexuality entitled “Male Primadonna”

[vodpod id=Groupvideo.3852013&w=425&h=350&fv=]

Okay, I’ll stop busting on the wedding aisle dance. The awful one.

Jim and Pam return from their honeymoon and are greeted by none other than Blind Guy McSqueezy…

B.G. McSqueezy, post-falling into a pool of acid eyes first.

…Michael’s new character that the women in his improv class absolutely hate, but yet he’s still so proud of it.

From there, we launch a nice subplot, wherein Dwight plants a listening device in a mallard on Jim’s desk.

And this takes us to the major crisis of the episode, which begins when Michael tells Jim that he’s taken a lover and it’s Pam’s mom.

I love how Jim confirms the affair:

Jim: “You did not have sex with Pam’s mom.”

Michael: “Big time.”

Jim: “What kind of car does she drive?”

Michael: “A green Camry.”

Jim: “F*%K!”

So Jim explodes with a serious warning not to tell Pam and to cease and desist the dating of her Mom. He obviously knows Pam well enough to know she will not take this well.

Jim: “For both of our sakes, never, ever ever see her again!”

"Then take another way home, man!"

And of course Michael can’t help but tell Pam.

Pam GOES NUTS (which was extreme, but I rolled with it) even trying to lead an office revolt in a conference room meeting about volunteerism and conservation (which is courtesy of an NBC initiative which inserted these themes into the actual scripts of each show on tonight’s lineup).

This scene is a classic Office cattle call, with so many little moments to savor.

• Look at how happy Stanley is, here, as the only one who’s joining Pam in her chant…

"No more meetings!"

• Meredith: “Paint a mural of Chicano leaders?”
• Michael calls Pam’s mom on the phone “boo” and “pickle.”
• Michael to Pam: “I am your boss, and I may someday be your father!”

Michael’s plea for acceptance pretty much falls on deaf ears, save Phyllis, who seriously crunches on him.

Michael: “I’m caring. I’m generous. I’m sensual. Is it really so horrible that I could possibly go out and find happiness?”

Why can't I be loved?

He’s right, of course, and what makes this situation so interesting is that Pam was the first person to support him with his personal trials. She saw him as a fragile human being when others dismissed him; she was his rock during the storms of Jan and Holly and she returned to Dunder Mifflin as his one of his conquering generals from the Michael Scott Paper Company. It will be interesting to see if this will continue a disintegration of the Pam-Michael alliance, and will this be treated seriously along with the humor?

We can’t forget Toby, who gets his first loving embrace from Michael…

"Once he got to know me..."

…and a few minutes later it’s back to being called a jackass. Poor Toby. But he deserves every scrap of garbage heaped on his head. Because it’s funny.

Toby’s attempts to broker a peace accord go down in flames, and when Pam throws down the gauntlet, Michael fires back: “I’m going to start dating her harder.” She knows what that means.

He also reveals that Jim knew about the affair, which leads to some classic Jim caught-in-the-headlights flustering…

"Barely. Didn't have all the facts. ~frank and beann...~"

…which I find to be hilarious. I’ve seen a number of internet posters complaining that Jim is such a wimp, that he needs to lay down the law with Pam when it comes to the office. But these moments are a nice counterpoint to the cutesy-mush- poop that they normally inflict upon us. We need some conflict up in that marshmallow center. (Also, I’m married and I realize more every day the power of a smartly-placed “Yes, dear.” It is a quiet power, a humble power, an ego-less power. Amongst other things.)

But Jim gets his manly moment when he takes out Dwight in a nice scene with a clueless Andy and an aria.

The mallard defense.

But Michael’s okay, he’s got plenty of female friends, right? They include…

• His mom.
• Pam’s mom.
• His aunt, although she just blocked him out of IM, and…
• What’s-her-face from Quiznos that he sees four times a week.

We’re left wondering, will we see more of Ryan’s fedora?

Sinatra and Dino, over here.

We end on, I will admit, a nice scene where Jim reminds Pam of their honeymoon highlights to calm her down, and a failed attempt to suggest that she may be over-reacting.

"Do you think I'm over-reacting." "Yeah, maybe." "But I don't think I am." "You're not."

And just so we don’t have to fade out completely on a patented Pam-Jim cutesy-poo, we get a nice Norman Bates-style denial of insanity from Dwight, straight into camera…

Not stupid enough to put his primary listening device in a wooden mallard.

Solid episode, guys.

your “tuna boss,”

Dan Calvisi
Dan’s Scriptomatic Cinematic Telematic 3D!

p.s. there’s some deleted scenes on nbc.com, immediately after the full episode replay, worth checking out.

[all images: nbc.com]

[this article also posted on joeonthetube.com]

"I will have the gabagool."

Nice rebound from last week’s wedding aisle dance spectacular with an episode that revolved around an absurd situation that had just enough credibility to hook us and the dolt triumvirate, aka Michael-Dwight-Andy aka the best thing about the show at this point. I’m thankful the writers didn’t worry about advancing story arcs and just focused on developing a hilarious setup.

And thank the soon-to-be-ousted Zucker that Jim and Pam were relegated to mere voices on the phone (they were honeymooning in Puerto Rico).

Is it a surprise to anyone that the show worked just fine without Mr. and Mrs. Happy Happy Jimjams?

But for me, the “gabagool” moment (the Tony Soprano pronunciation of capicolla, the deli meat) was an instant Office perennial. (And let me make clear that I come from an Italian family but never heard capicolla pronounced that way. Granted, the only time it ever came up at all was during an order at Togo’s sandwich shop, but still, park your stereotypes at the door, sizzle chest.)

If the entire episode had taken place at the lunch table and revolved around Michael ordering the “gabagool” I would have been happy. This was nicely escalated by Michael’s goodfellas…

Andy (wiseguy accent): “You know, the gabagoo?”

Dwight (yelling): “Bring him the gabagool!”

Then Michael puts the topper on it: “I’ll have the spaghetti. With a side salad. If the salad is on top, I send it back.”

Andy is summoned outside to fix a woman’s car (because he’s wearing a mechanic’s outfit so he can bring a tire iron into the restaurant as a weapon in case it gets ugly, why else?) and he explodes her engine, telling her “that’s totaled, you’re gonna want to get a refund.” Great moment.

Kevin’s disastrous stint in Jim’s office was a nice b story, although too much of Kevin talking in that voice (i.e., Kevin talking) can get tedious. But it kept Jim and Pam on that phone; again, only a good thing.

And they nicely reined in Dwight. He was silly and hardcore in the signature Schrute way without going bat-poopy insane on us. Case in point: his reaction to Andy saying that Michael will wake up with a horse’s head in his bed. Dwight reacted instantly with a quick rebuttal and an exasperated, knowing look that can only come from a beet farmer who pioneered a more efficient method to make hamburgers out of horses. We thankfully didn’t get the cut to an interview where he talks about how your average American has no concept of how to decapitate a horse. No need, the short line and the look got the job done. Kudos on the restraint, creative team.

Another element that I loved was the repetition of the word “mafia.” Who says mafia any more? And they just kept repeating it, especially Andy…

"You made the mafia apologize to you. You made the mafia be POLITE."

Of course, once Michael finds out that they tricked him into thinking the salesman was not in the mob, while he most definitely was, he’s initially scared…but then he realizes he was just a complete bad-ass so he tells his war story to the entire office, adding that he told the guy “If any of your friends come around here, they’re dead. I said something like that.” Prompting Oscar to comment “Let’s be clear he backed down an insurance salesman from Mutual of Harrisburg.”

But Michael will not be put in a corner. So he makes it clear who wears the pants with his coffee order to Erin…

"If it's not Stop'n'Shop, I send it back."

Solid episode. And props to actor Mike Starr, a go-to tough guy actor who never overdoes the “New York Italian Guy” bit like too many of his peers and will always be remembered as Frenchy in Goodfellas (”I’m the night watchman, I’m the Commandant.”) and as Eddie the Sinatra-wannabe in Spike Lee’s Summer of Sam.

"Garlic bread. Toasted, not burnt."

When I first met my wife, she turned me on to the darkly comedic elements of Summer of Sam and we watched it more than once on her crappy vcr and tiny TV. And now, we’ve graduated to an outdated dvd player and bigger, but still analog and crappy, TV. But at least we’re not getting shaken down by Grotti, who definitely changed his name from Gotti.

See ya’s next week, fuggedaboutit.

-Danny C.
(button man in Grotti crew)
Dan’s Scriptomatic Cinematic Telematic in 3D!

photo credits: nbc.com

p.s. For anyone who wants more of Erin the receptionist, here’s a decent deleted scene featuring her on nbc.com…

[vodpod id=Groupvideo.3665711&w=425&h=350&fv=]

Spoofing a viral video that's already forgotten 3 months later?

My greatest fear right now is that we may have just witnessed the exact moment The Office jumped the shark.

The wedding aisle dance.

I’m not saying this is definitely IT, because of course I can’t predict the future quality of the show. But it’s a benchmark. It’s definitely…something.

(sidenote: Can you believe the “JK wedding dance” video debuted on July 19, less than 3 months ago? The web has completely distorted my perception of time when it comes to events. I initially wrote that this video came out last year, January at the latest.)

I get the intention of the bit. It was supposed to be bad, meant to be a horribly uncool choice by Jim’s idiot brothers that is embraced by all the horribly uncool guest list. An act of kitsch that Jim and Pam would abhor, thus they are supposed to realize that not only are they powerless to stop it thus should just give in and enjoy it, but that it comes from a place of love from their friends and family.

Yeah, I get it.

Or maybe that they realize they did in fact try to micromanage their nuptials too much? But I’m not convinced that the writers on the show do think Jim and Pam were acting like wedding douches so that one doesn’t hold as much weight for me.

Whatever, enough trying to explain or defend it.

For the record, I found many parts of the episode to be funny (see below). It’s just that the wedding aisle dance, and the entire cliche device of Jim and Pam running off to have their own ceremony, on their own terms, while blissfully, incredibly, uber-romantically happy…represents, for me, the apex of the growing trend of niceness on a show that used to run so efficiently on cruelty.

If this had been an exception to the standard of awkwardness, then it would have been a nice surprise. But there’s been so frickin’ many of those moments over the past couple seasons that I just wanted to boot my TV into a half-empty swimming pool full of decapitated action figures and drowned Frasier-lovers.

Even so, I still love the show and will give it a chance; I’m not condemning it to sitcom hell or anything. There’s already places down in that fiery pit reserved for Two and a Half Men, The Big Bang Theory and the new Jenna Elfman sitcom that is about three weeks in and could be the worst piece of abortion shite in the history of the medium (and shall remain nameless because it’s not worth the 30 seconds of my time it would take to look it up; Definitely, Maybe? The Happening?). So TV Hades is crowded down there, and The Office will run at least 4 more seasons, unless Steve Carell decides to leave (although I could see them continuing the show without him). And there’s still a lot of funny stuff left in there.

But…I mean…just…grrr…c’monnnnn…

Click. Cliche-meter activated.

Mental picture taking? Really?

Is anyone else boiling with rage that their favorite sitcom has been hijacked by the Today Show?

Okay, it wasn’t ALL bad. There were funny moments…here’s my favs…

"To waiting."

Not on the registry.

Yeah, let's just order room service.

And sure, it’s tough to sustain the funny over two episodes shown back to back. But did we really need to open on a vomitorium?

Didn't need to *airquotes*go there*/airquotes* did we?

My problem with this cold open was two fold…

1) I was eating a delicious tofutti cutie at the time.

Do not eat while watching barf-fest 2009.

2) It justified Pam’s riDICKulous request of her workmates that they cut down on perfume and adjust their eating habits because of her queasy pregnant stomach. Based on the TV writers that I’ve met (an egotistical, pretentious lot if ever there was one; at least the ones under 50 who haven’t yet experienced a nice humbling 2-5 year unemployment stint once their show, and style, “goes away” as they say), I’m willing to bet that The Office writers are frighteningly close to Pam and Jim in their belief that they are the first people ever to get pregnant and get married (in that order, because no one in Hollywood, real or fictional, knows how to use birth control).

Enough barfing. Mine and the show’s. I’ll end on a good note; I thought this little moment was hilarious…

"See you in Viagra fallllls."

I love the voice.

And I’ll be there next week. The steam should have stopped bursting from my ears by then.

reporting from a delightful cottage in scenic Niagara Falls,

-Dan Calvisi
Dan’s Scriptomatic Cinematic Telematic in 3D!

possibly coming soon: My “jumping the shark” photoshop montage that I spent 2 hours on and then ditched because it wasn’t coming together and I had 50 other things to do, you know, like, actual “paid work” as they refer to it in this economy. (Man, I’m really in a bad mood, huh? I’ll try not to be such a snarky dillweed next week, but that’s really up to NBC now, isn’t it?)

A toast to gin in "World's Best Boss" mugs, which is awesome.

This season has been all about strengthening the two essential truths of the show:

1. Steve Carell IS the show; he’s the tent pole, the most hilarious and talented actor in the cast and they’re incredibly lucky that he decided to stay on the show even after his movie career took off. Only he can sell a line like this in a nerd voice: “Con: you unzip your pants and you find that there’s a calculator down there.” The guy is brilliant.  His appearance on Leno the night before was great, too.  But unfortunately, there’s a nemesis to this hero…
2. The interview segments are becoming an increasing liability.  Especially when they involve Pam or Dwight.

I’d love to see them try an episode without a single interview.  Has there been one?  What about when they’ve gone outside the office, like the boat party episode back in the day?  You office geeks with better memories than I can answer that one.

Yeah, the cold open was funny when it was Jim toying with Dwight…until Dwight’s interview where he started yelling out some kind of quasi-wrestling match challenge.  He also screamed in an interview in the first episode of the season, and it wasn’t funny then, either.

I know there are unconditional Dwight lovers out there.  I am not one of them.  And it’s not Rainn Wilson’s fault; when the writers keep Dwight weird, as opposed to maniacal, it works. Like Creed.  You don’t see Creed yelling.  He’s just batshit insane, how we like him.

IMHO, the show most often misses when it tries to go too BIG and BROAD.  Sometimes it works, like with parkour or Phyllis ending up on the hood of Michael’s car (or was it Meredith?).  But when it involves Dwight shouting at the top of his lungs or Pam squealing with adorable glee over seeing the name “Mrs. Pam Halpert” for the first time…then, in my living room, at least, you can hear crickets.

Oscar’s interview in this episode, however, was the one that worked.  Because it was clever and it was Oscar being Oscar: “It doesn’t take a genius to know that any organization thrives when it has two leaders…Where would Catholicism be without the Popes?” It served as a nice commentary on the previous scene and the perfect bridge into the next.  Nice going, Oscar.

Don’t get me wrong.  I really enjoyed the episode , laughed several times and again, this show is still funnier than most comedies on the air even with an okay episode.  But I just hate to feel that pit in my stomach when there’s a funny moment followed by a groaner, ya know?  But I digress.

We come to the meat of the episode and the season thus far: Jim vs. Michael.  Michael thinks he’s the “Senior Co-Manager” and Jim thinks he knows more about Michael since he knows all of Michael’s faults. They’re both wrong.

So after they try to get David Wallace to choose which of them will handle the yearly bonus issue (Michael’s follow-up to David’s statement that this issue is both ‘big picture’ and ‘day to day”: “Which is it more?”), Jim tries his hand at announcing to the troops his brilliant plan for awarding bonuses only to the sales staff.  Would anyone be so dumb as to announce that to an entire staff?  Probably not.  But it worked well to reiterate what we glimpsed in a previous episode: Jim still has a lot to learn about managing the branch.

Dwight takes advantage of Jim’s misstep in making like he cares about his co-workers, which we know he does NOT.  Dwight actually looks to be a pretty good politician at this point (but it won’t last long).  Then Michael steps in, gets a great dig on Jim and just when it looks like he’s going to save the day with his plan to give small pay increases across the board (which is actually smart and fair) he launches into a pointless speech about how they are best friends who give each other heart-ons…which is a gift.

In this spirit, Angela should lend Oscar a cup of sugar.

Michael blows it just as he always does, by failing to identify the real problem, or what one might call, the “big picture.” Which is what he’s supposed to be doing.

The “Boston baked bean plan” is also a disaster (and a hilarious sidebar):

Jim knows this is the kind of thing he used to mock Michael for, right?

So we’ve got two inept managers, but Dwight only cares about ousting Jim, so he gives a William Wallace-esque speech to rally the troops and stage a coup.

"Give us freeeedommmm!"

This call-to-arms is greeted with lethargy, and we end on Jim, alone, wondering if Michael is his only friend left in the office, and Pam…right?

What, me, worry?

Oh, and Pam and Jim are getting a “romantic bird-feeder mailbox” from Phyllis as a wedding present, and Ryan manages to bilk $50 out of Pam in some kind of high school basketball ponzi scheme. But we’ve already forgot about that, because…

Next week is the BIG Jim-Pam wedding! How do we know it’s BIG?  Because a band of circus performers in NBC t-shirts just came to my door to tell me so.

Ya think NBC has spent a few bucks on this ad campaign?

There’s even a JIM-PAM WEDDING WEBSITE!  Click on the image below to visit halpertbeesly.com…

Get the joke that in trying not to be a pretentious wedding couple, they're being a pretentious wedding couple?

I’m getting them any one of the several bobbleheads now available to the discerning Office fan…in limited supply so snatch them up now…okay the Andy Bernard one is pretty cool, but still…

Now available for only $19 each!

faithfully submitted,

Dan.

p.s. Starting now, for a limited time only, if you visit my site, you will find no merchandising whatsoever…

-Dan’s Scriptomatic Cinematic Telematic Blog in 3D!

A central conflict built around Michael’s betrayal of Jim leads to a dramatic plot turn that I predict may end in this season’s cliffhanger — will Jim or Michael run the Dunder Mifflin branch?

By the way, do you think Jim’s competing job offer was real?  Sound off in the comments.

Jim confronts Michael, which leads to a great moment: Michael gets choked up at the thought of losing Jim, and Pam, and now the baby.

He can’t lose the baby.

Eventually, Michael does the right thing and gets Jim the promotion, while demoting himself to Co-Manager along with his “best friend.”

Dwight left out in the cold, once again.

There’s Dwight, once again playing second fiddle to Jim Halpert.  But don’t cry for our mustard-shirted beet farmer, as he got the chance to put his private investigator hat on, teaming up with Toby, of all people, to catch Darryl in the act of worker’s comp fraud.

This didn’t go quite according to plan.  Seconds after Toby explodes in expletives (for the first time?)…

Flenderson Unchained!

…the guys crack the case…kind of…not really.

Oops.

A hilarious, well-choreographed sight gag.  This leads to actual strong detective work by Dwight, incriminating Darryl, but Darryl has ammunition with his threat of a complaint of sexual harassment against his “baby sister.”  Wait, does he mean baby linebacker?

Dwight gets cut from the Eagles.

So Toby ends up drowning in paperwork (with a red welt on his head that he’s treating with an ice cream drumstick, if anyone caught that).

Meanwhile, Pam attempts to get RSVPs for her wedding from some of the dumbest, most self-absorbed people in Scranton…

Ryan: I’ll probably stop by.

Pam: It costs $75 a person.

Ryan: I once had a glass of cognac that cost $77.

This makes sense only to Ryan, or perhaps Meredith, who had her own take on her RSVP…

Pam: You are going to text me on the morning of my wedding and you’ll eat whatever’s fanciest?

Meredith: Unless there’s ribs.

For anyone who’s ever planned a wedding, Pam’s plight hits home in a BIG way. I don’t think it’s out of line to wish that Ryan and Meredith die in fiery car crashes en route to Niagara Falls.

There was also the Nard-dog’s confusion over how to respond to his cousin’s email: “Hey Andy, let’s go visit grandma and then get drunk together, ha ha.” And the cold open found Michael asking Oscar if he should have a safe word when he gets a colonoscopy. Solid bits.

But by far, my favorite gag was Michael’s “makeshift cheese cart” plot.  The very plan itself is classic Michael, and Andy’s turn as a top-shelf sommelier is an inspired heightening of the bit…

"Also from the great state of Wisconsin, an aged parmesan."

And now we get to this week’s social issue, a call to action, if you will, for justice to be served.

There was one bit of action that I missed, due to a problem that seems to have gone unnoticed by the media, and by extension, the entire planet: those of us without wide-screen TVs are being discriminated against with the networks’ increasing use of activity in the corners of the frame!

Suddenly, every TV director is Paul Thomas Anderson.

So I had to watch the internet stream to actually see Michael climb out from under the cheese cart…

Evidence A in my epochal lawsuit against every major network.

…and I was pissed.  Because my people, those of us who still own analog television sets without wide-screen aspect ratios (1:1.33?  Who am I, James Cameron?), are discriminated against every time a show airs that is not letterboxed.  Do you have any idea how we feel when we hear a line from a character and that actor is actually offscreen when it’s clear that the filmmakers intended for them to be onscreen?!

Would it kill the networks to broadcast in letterbox format once again, like E.R. in 2001?  Was it really that long ago? Does technology really move so fast? Don’t look at me for that answer, because, once again, <airquotes>not George Lucas over here</airquotes>, but I do know one thing…

This economic telematic racism must stop.

It’s hard to put into words for those of you who have never walked in my shoes.  It’s like I’m a Native American…being driven from my own living room…by digital pirates.

That’s what that is. So screw you, NBC. (Even though your current Thursday night comedy lineup is pretty freakin’ solid, if I may complement you whilst planning my revenge upon ye and yours.)

And although I wasn’t fond of the Dwight Schrute scream to end the episode — I know how he feels…

The Scream.

No, Dwight, you can’t have a plasma for Christmas.  Maybe next year, when broadcast media becomes fair.

-Dan.

Parkour!

Here’s the greatest thing about the opening of the sixth season of The Office: no one has EVER yelled “parkour!” while doing parkour.

That is, until the three worst practitioners of parkour came along, five years too late, no less: Michael Scott, Dwight Schrute and Andy “the nard-dog” Bernard.  We know this will not end well, and so does Jim: “Technically, they are doing Parkour, as long as Point A is delusion and Point B is the hospital.”

This inspired cold open ends with Andy reaching point B, as he attempts their greatest parkour challenge, which was supposed to finish with a “backflip gainer into the trashcan.”

Parkour!

Parkour?

Great opening. It confirms that we are indeed going to get some of our favorite show conventions this season, like the trio of Michael, Dwight and Andy doing incredibly stupid stuff; and soon, we will get the classic story engine of Michael Scott doing something dumb to be popular, having it backfire, and then doing something even dumber to try to fix it, which leads to utter disaster.

But before we get to that, we unfortunately learn that one of the worst conventions of The Office is also back: those super cutesy-poo, delightfully quirky, utterly painful Jim-Pam interviews where they do one of their “bits”…

Cue the "shotgun bit"...and fail.

In addition to just being wrong for the characters (The “free at last” line is straight out of the Michael Scott playbook, not Jim’s) the scene is functional: it confirms they are preggers.

Which is kind of a letdown, considering this moment that closed last season was SO blatantly a pregnancy announcement that I was hoping for at least a smidgeon of misdirection…

Yep, they're pregnant. I knew it!

I mean, what if there was some kind of twist?  Not that I’m looking for some Desperate Housewives up in my office, but it would be nice if maybe Jim (or Pam, even better) showed a hint of trepidation, fear, or worry about the incoming child (which will of course be an adorable, incurably happy moppet).

Nope, she’s pregnant.  They’re both ecstatic about it.  Couldn’t be happier.

They’re still the most happy and romantic couple on Earth, their pictures featured on Wikipedia under the “on the nose” entry. (ed. note: Boosh! is what that was.)

But I’m sniping.  The rest of the episode was classic Dunder-Mifflin goodness, and Michael’s dialogue was fantastic.  Every line was crafted with care and hit out of the park by Steve Carell; from the big punchlines (“And that’s why Spartacus is a classic whodunnit.”) to the smaller quips (“This place is like Spaniard Fly.”), it was all on point and in character and gleaming with great word choice.  Kudos to the writers of this episode, Greg Daniels and Paul Lieberstein (Lieberstein also plays Toby, who didn’t get much screen time in this episode but he delivered a keeper: “I have a daughter; how could I be a virgin?”)

Now let’s talk Ed Helms and the awesome subplot of Andy asking his workmates if he’s gay.  It’s not that he wants to know if they think he’s gay, or if he looks gay, it’s that he wants them to tell him if he’s gay or not.

Coincidence?

It seems that they can do no wrong with the Andy character.

Now, prepare yourself, because I’m going to unleash some of “Dan’s Hollywood Prescience” on you…

Ed Helms will be top-lining major comedy movies very soon.

He’s in the exact position Steve Carell was in, pre-The 40 Year-Old Virgin.  He’s kicking ass on a hit tv show (Carell was a hit on The Daily Show, remember that?), he’s coming off a MASSIVE comedy hit, The Hangover, the inexplicably biggest R-rated comedy OF ALL TIME, with a great character role, not unlike Steve Carell with his breakout roles in Bruce Almighty and Anchorman. So he’s poised and ready, you just wait and see, faithful viewer of ha ha cinema.

“Dan’s Hollywood Prescience” over.  You’re welcome.

But please disregard the announcements in major media publications about movie deals that Ed Helms has signed.  You can’t make this kind of call without living in the ‘Wood like I do and being plugged into the most effective covert wall-fly network in the industry. After all, I live less than two miles from John Krasinski’s home, which he’s currently selling for $1.245 million if you’ve got the cash. I’d put in a bid, but who has the time?  There’s SO many blogs to read with pithy recaps of television shows…but yet so few that manage to grab the coolest screencaps, like I do. Zing!

Moving on…the backbone of the episode is a classic Michael Scott blunder — in a bid to be cool, Michael spreads a horrible lie about Stanley having an affair, but it turns out to be true as Stanley confesses to Michael in his car, a scene that threw me at first but on second viewing I have to say it’s a fascinating moment in that it’s the first time in the show’s history that Stanley has been civil with Michael and the first time he’s genuinely asked Michael for help. Let’s hope it’s a breakout moment for the Stanley character and the talented actor that plays him: Leslie David Baker.

But we still love our Stanley mean and grumpy and living up to Phyllis’ assessment: “Stanley hates crowds, kids and music.” So let’s hope he doesn’t get too soft and mushy.

Back to Michael — he reacts to the Stanley news by doing what he always does: he comes up with a plan ever stupider than the first — spreading ridiculous lies so the Stanley truth will be discounted when they all turn out to be false — which leads to even worse consequences, as the whole staff turns on him (cue angry mob sequence at the elevator, which always works), and necessitates him being bailed out by Jim and Pam.

Pam's vagina!

I realize I’ve skipped over so many great moments, so let’s hit a few now, like Meredith’s blatant sexual harassment of the intern…

Meredith goes all "Disclosure" on the Asian kid.

…or Creed’s master plan of scuba…

"What's the point if I can't scuba?"

…no other details needed, just “scuba.”

And Kevin’s creep of the week moment…

"But THEN I thought, Pam doesn't NEED padding."

Some other quick observations:

Andy’s two other pre-gay foreshadowing moments: Dwight riding him in the parkour scene, and the female intern opening a jar of salsa for him.

“Broccoli Rob” = brilliance.

Another horrible tale from Michael’s childhood: “I should’ve known.  Poopball?”

Michael calling Stanley’s wife Cynthia (the name of his mistress) twice.

My only concern about the show at this point (other than Jim-Pam cutesy-pooness) is that Dwight’s cruelty and violent nature goes too far at times, to the point where I just don’t buy it, like him dressing down the interns, ending on how the girl will “make a great mother.”  I just don’t buy that none of his co-workers would have said anything. It fell flat for me.

Of course, that’s not even a 5 on the Dwight crazy-meter, what with him hiding crossbows and Rambo knives around the office, but it still irks me that they’ve taken his character so far into fantasy-land.  This is still at its core a <airquotes>reality-based show</airquotes>, set within an office; he’s not the zany neighbor that barrels through the unlocked front door with yet another crazy scheme.

When The Office hits the right note, it can be utterly ridiculous but still work — like during last season’s casual Friday when Meredith wore a tiny skirt with no underwear on…or this week when Michael asks Jim and Pam how long they’ve known about the pregnancy (“…a week?  A month?  A year?”).

Great line.

And with that, we close on another Jim Pam interview scene…but this one, I will admit, was funny.  And they wisely kept it short, so as best to mine said funny…

"That's clear now?"

The Office is back.